Want happiness? Live A Life of GRATITUDE.

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”

~Oprah

It begins when you utter that simple sentence. "Thank You."

Ahhhhhh........Happiness.

People spend their entire lives searching for it with little to no success.

They buy nicer clothes, fancier cars, bigger houses. They get promoted to better, higher-paying jobs...to no avail. They get married, have kids...and yet, they still aren't happy.

Perplexed? Don't be. It's simple, actually. They don't live a life of gratitude.

It takes no money and very little effort.

Sadly, most people focus on what they don't have instead of being grateful for what they do have.

I know what you're thinking...."That's not me." Not true. When is the last time you uttered any of these sentences lately?

"I hate my job."

Be thankful you have one.

"My kids are horrible."

Be thankful you have kids. Some have lost theirs, others cannot have any.

"I'm sick."

Be thankful you're alive.

"My house is so ugly."

Be thankful you have a roof over your head.

"I'm unhappy with the way I look."

There are those born with disfigurement, been in accidents, or with physical disabilities.

It's easy to focus on what you don't have. It's harder to be thankful for the things you do.

We live in a world where material possessions take priority over family, friendships, relationships.

We are surrounded by narcissitic, ungrateful people who complain and make everything about them instead of focusing on what they can give to others. Sound familiar?

Value those around you.

When's the last time you called your parents to thank them for all the sacrifices they made for you? Called a former boss to express thanks for all the opportunities they gave and skills they taught you?

Text a friend to thank them for all the "favors"?

Called a sibling or family member to say, simply, "Thank you for being you."

Time to shift your focus...from negative to positive...from dispair to peace.

When you have gratitude for your life, you want less. You don't need more, more, more. Funny thing is -- that's the moment you begin to become blessed beyond measure with opportunities, relationships and true happiness.

Ever notice when you buy a new car?
The first day you drive it off the lot, you're happy. You're excited. It smells new; it turns heads. Over time, though...the newness wears off. You see other nicer, better cars. You envy their owners. You want a NEWER car.

Same with a significant other.

When you first start dating, they're amazing. When you walk down the street, they turn heads. Everything they say is funny, the way they chew is cute, the way they laugh...adorable.

Over time, though, the newness wears off. All of the sudden everything is annoying. You hate the way they chew their food, the way they cackle when they laugh. You see other, better looking boyfriends or girlfriends. You envy their mates. You want a NEWER one.



There's a word for that. It's called envy. Envy is the opposite of gratitude. It leads to materialism and distracts from feelings of well being and happiness. Think material items are going to make you happy? WRONG. It actually leads to lower self-esteem, more anxiety, and less self-actualization.

Highly materialistic people are also (big surprise here) less successful in personal relationships.

Having a gracious attitude improves your mood and enhances your life. It makes material items less appealing. Those who live gratefully tend to have more friendships and stronger social networks.

So....are you ready to begin your life of gratitude and accept your blessings?

When you don't know something...be thankful you have the opportunity to learn.
For the difficult times...be brave and find your inner strength.
For each new challenge...look forward to the blessings ahead.
For mistakes...find the lesson (there is always one) and become a better person.
When you're tired and weary...be thankful that tomorow will be a better day.

Spend five minutes before you go to bed every night giving thanks and visualizing the great accomplishments and blessings that are coming your way tomorrow.

What are YOU thankful for?

NOBODY ever became GREAT by saying, "I CAN'T".

NOBODY ever became GREAT by saying, "I CAN'T".

It's a phrase that's conditioned into our brains. "I can't".

Where does this come from?

Why do we say it?

We aren't born naked, pink, kicking and screaming out of the womb with this negative phrase in our vocabulary. As a matter of fact - people, by nature...are actually quite positive. As babies, we laugh, we try, we act like nothing is impossible. As young people, we are invincible -- the world is our playground. Then we grow up and all the playful dreams of our youth are squashed by the realities of our disappointing lives. 

Dramatic? Maybe...but it's a trend I've noticed again and again, even in the professional world that I live in. Perfectly capable people repeating this phrase over, and over...and over. For me, hearing this is like watching somebody file their nails on a chalkboard.

So why do we do it? Simple. It's easy.

It's easier to complain, easier to groan, moan & be negative like the rest of them. It's hard to be positive, at least...it's harder. It requires work. A proactive, solution-based approach to problems. It requires preparation, thought, foresight, troubleshooting, compromise, premature baldness and aging, stress and ultimately....time and effort.

Fear and lack of self-confidence play a role in this. The inability to believe that you, in fact, can accomplish anything. Fear of failure, fear of change, fear that perhaps you actually might not have what it takes to accomplish your dreams or get what you really want out of life. 

Even (*gasp*)...perhaps thinking that you don't deserve success or happiness in the first place.

The alternative? You don't try. You become that bitter, angry person in the back cubicle shooting down everyone's ideas, hating on their success, internalizing your own failures, complaining, raining on everyone's parade, becoming the Captain of that ship....oh, what's it called? Ah, yes...."bring-me-down".

The problem is that most of us don't embrace failure. Stay with me...I'm going somewhere with this. We are, in fact...deathly afraid to fail. But, you see....without failure, we don't learn. We don't appreciate. We don't succeed. You see, in the end, failure is actually success -- as long as we take a lesson from every defeat. You lose a few battles, but ultimately, you win the war.

Naturally, most of us want to be great at everything we try to accomplish. The thing is, eventually...you will. The reality is that aside from the Mozarts of this world, chances are when you first begin your journey towards greatness...you're gonna SUCK. And that's scary. But, the great thing about sucking? You can only get better. And after a while, you're not gonna suck anymore. You see, the people that actually make it aren't always the prettiest, the best, the most talented...they are, in fact, the people that never give up. The people that believe they CAN.

You're probably shaking your head, agreeing with this. But, will you change? Aha! That's the question. It's a hard habit to break. Once you've succumbed to the ever-increasing world of negativity, it's so hard to break the habit. But, alas, like any other "bad habit" (i.e. chain smoking, biting your nails, interrupting, not flossing) the habit of "negativity" can be broken.

That's the good news....but, how do we do it?

First, BE AWARE. Be aware how many times throughout the day you say any of the following phrases, words, or combination thereof:

"I can't"

"I won't"

"Impossible"

Next, take them OUT of  your vocabulary! Try this...every time you accidentally say it, follow it up with one of these:

"But...I will try my best!"

"However, now I can"

"At one time...but now entirely possible!"

You see, the trick is just to be aware. Once you notice how often you utilize these words, you might be pretty surprised! 

Why is this so important? Glad you asked. You see, we are what we say. We create our own world, we create our success, we create our attitude, we create our REALITY. 

Say what you want, how you're going to get it...and BELIEVE that not only will you get it...but that you DESERVE it.

Each and every one of us has a goal, a dream....and one thing is certain......it IS possible. 

Just remember...NOBODY ever became GREAT by saying, "I CAN'T".

Let me introduce myself...

Let me introduce myself...

 

Ok.....so social media has officially taken over my life. I have a Facebook fan page, a Facebook personal page for my friends & family, a twitter, instagram (FOXyCassandra29), a Pinterest, a MySpace hanging out in outer space (is that still around??), and now I've finally given in to the world of blogging.

I've got a lot on my mind, so I thought why not put it in writing in the hopes that even if one person read it and was inspired, that it was all worth it. Or...if nothing else, to document the erratic, chaotic insanity that is inside of my brain, and ultimately is my life.

Obviously I love fashion...but if you're reading this looking for fashion advice only, well...you've come to the wrong blog! "Cassandra's Closet" is both a literal translation and a figurative one. I'm opening the door to what's inside of my closet, and ultimately....inside of my head. (Scary, I know!)

This blog is about so much more. The idea of beauty and fashion emcompasses the latest trends or makeup tips. How to look ten years younger, appear ten pounds slimmer, how to achieve the perfect tan or the perfect updo. Sure, I can show you that.

I'm talking about true beauty. That isn't something that is easily achieved nor easily found for many...the problem is most are looking in the wrong place. How do I know? Well, I've seen it first hand.

The purpose of this blog is to improve our inner beauty, spirit, strength....in order to feel it and exude it in every breath we take. To educate, uplift, and ultimately inspire men, women, the minority and the majority to be better, to live better...to want better. Only then is the final result a beauty in the truest sense.

Cheesy? Maybe....but let me introduce myself. I am a female in a male-dominated industry. I've worked my butt off for nearly a decade achieving what most could only dream of. I've been behind-the-scenes as an associate producer, producer, executive producer of local programming, and in front of the camera as a fashion contributor and now a TV host in morning entertainment & lifestyle programming.

I'm an ordinary girl living an extraordinary life. I say this not to sound self-serving, but to share the intimate secrets it took me most of my career -- and good old blood, sweat, tears and experience to acquire in the hopes it will be that much easier for you.

I certainly hope I didn't lose you already. But, if you're still reading this I must have peaked your interest. So, for those of you still around.....I'd love to share my journey with you....

I encourage your critiques, comments, questions & conversation.

P.S. Put on your seatbelt...it's gonna be a bumpy ride!

~C